muchas gracias

just a note to say thank you

so i've been thinking (in the toilet!! :p)

you've been there during my lowest moments, when i'm acting like a painful emotional *itch.

you were there during my highest moments when i'm shrill (yes.yes. i admit), laughing at every possible unfunny thing, completely hyper to the point i start to hyperventilate.

you listened, till now (where im still an emotional wreck).

and because i know im SUPER forgetful, i'd like to remember this forever. hence, dedicating this post to you.

i know we had rough patches (super understatement) but you know what? from the bottom of my heart, i do not regret one bit staying put when people were telling me to walk away.

i can tell you&experience sunshine, storm, spring, autumn, Katrina and breeze and you'll still be there lending an ear, maybe two if you could afford it and even your shoulder(for what reason i don't know).

you know MOST of my memories, even ones i dont even remember anymore, sadly. i know i overloaded you with them a couple of years ago (5 years worth)(i,personally would die). sorry lahhh :):)

i know i'm aunty, grandma or whatever you wanna call me. i dont care. ill still be me.

im just glad you stood by this super uncool friend :D

you know who you are (at least i hope you do)

thank you for being ever supportive.

as much as you needed me as a friend, i think i needed it more.

what i wish is that i could return the favour and deed you've done for me, and never to let you down. i know i will. i wish i wouldn't. and i will try my best not to.

friends forever? (haha. this is so elementary school)

M

great stuff

its amazing how some people talk about bullies&meanies

what they don't realise is that they're doing the exact same thing

putting people down the exact same way

picking on people whenever opportunity rises

it guess its always easier to look at the other person's faults

and never in the mirror to see the real person you are, also who you're affecting.

then again, i probably do that too.

what goes around comes around and bites you in the arse hard. and the world makes sense again. \

and then there are the ones who just plain bully&victimise. oh lovely people.

sewing

my first sewing class today

brought the sewing machine w/o thread, bobbin & all the other tiny apparatus to my first class. what a fool.

this is the result of being lazy and relying on assumptions.

learned about the French Seam, did some alterations and made my FIRST PILLOW CASE (in 2 ++ hrs) from scratch (plain cloth)!!!

4 hours passed really quickly actually.

i did some really stupid mistakes along the way and i HATE it when you sew something on the wrong side/way and you gotta unpick it.

the class was rather enjoyable and it feels really good after you've completed something and it doesn't look half bad.

tomorrow ill be making an apron & doing some more alterations. whee :)

-------------------------------------

hung out with cousin, dct. watched a movie, chatted, shopped & ate korean food. pleasant day.

determining factor

you know you're a nerd when...

toothpaste foam from brushing your teeth falls onto the sink with a layer of water on its surface, starts to disperse in random directions and you think...

BROWNIAN MOTION!

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

6.55am

woken up by TC. says he woke up at 4+. i was like... whaaaa?

TC: "CHECK RESULTS!!!!"

M: haaaa? you sure its out at 7and not 8/9? (still half asleep)

TC: YES!! (blabber something something time difference...day savings... more dots - still wasn't awake yet)

M: okayokayokay.

washed my face. read Habakkuk 3:17-19, said a little prayer and

logged onto myresults.cie.org.uk

wait wait wait

page finally loads

type in username and password

wait wait wait

fails

try again

wait wait wait

fails AGAIN

TRY AGAIN

this went on for like... 5 times

-_-

i would say i was pretty calm the day before (sunday) and the whole night (no nightmares about results whatsoever. in fact, i had nightmares about other stupid issues which are NOT supposed to be more important than my results. things i think and ponder about sometimes are really, really idiotic.)

i was pretty calm until the moment where i was waiting for the page to load after i typed in my username, password and pressed Enter. i grabbed my blanket from my bed and hugged it really tightly.

when the page loaded (finally)...

i saw :

A (AL)

A (AL)

A (AL)

A (AL)

at first i was thinking.. AL? wth is AL? (that was how worried i was at the moment)

so i had to scan that column 3-4 times before it registered that

I AM GOING TO EDINBURGH!!!!!!

praise God!!

can't wait

There's a light in the dark

Where the sky splits apart

Where the stars find a way

To shine through all the spaces in between

Here we are face to face

All alone in this place

And the night is finally coming down to you and me

Tell me where you've been hiding?

Oh I want to know

You're my silver lining covered in gold

Tell me what am I feeling?

Well it's hard to explain

Like underwater breathing

Swimming in rain

All I want to do

Is fall even deeper with you

And never come up, breathing underwater

I'm weightless with every little kiss you steal, boy

You are making me feel

Like I'm breathing, breathing underwater

I wanna fly through the blue

Lake on the bottom with you

Get lost in the waves,

Let the world slip away

When nobody can find us,

I don't want to be saved

Leave it all behind us,

Make an escape

Tell me what am I feeling?

Ohhh it's hard to explain

Like underwater breathing,

Swimming in rain

Wanna go to the edge

Wanna dive in again

Here we are face to face

All alone in this place

& it's finally coming down to you and me

Breathing Underwater

I can't wait for Marie Digby's new album to come out in Malaysia/wherever I will be when it goes worldwide!

chronology

rottweiler puppies galore

1st day - birth (already fully coated with fur)

2nd day - their umbilical cords dry up to what looked like black string

+/- 4th day - tie tails with rubber band

3 days later - tails start falling off & disappearing (speculation : the mother eats them?)

start applying some white powder on the mini tail to avoid infection

1 week++ old - eyes start opening. express growth in size

2 weeks++old - mother starts getting grumpy & refuses to feed them especially while she is enjoying her meal. barks and growls at the poor puppies.

cowardice

i'm afraid of letting people see the person i really am inside despite my being rather transparent nearly all the time.

i'm afraid of them knowing the emotions i hold despite me speaking my mind often

i'm afraid of penning the feelings down in black and white despite me doing it this very moment

i'm afraid of countless things despite being the daredevil i am

i'm afraid me being myself hurts other people despite waking up every morning acting as i am

i'm afraid of being abandoned despite the independent person i like to be

i'm afraid (,)

i'm a coward

this is nothing to savour or share but i'm definitely breathing it.