chronology

rottweiler puppies galore

1st day - birth (already fully coated with fur)

2nd day - their umbilical cords dry up to what looked like black string

+/- 4th day - tie tails with rubber band

3 days later - tails start falling off & disappearing (speculation : the mother eats them?)

start applying some white powder on the mini tail to avoid infection

1 week++ old - eyes start opening. express growth in size

2 weeks++old - mother starts getting grumpy & refuses to feed them especially while she is enjoying her meal. barks and growls at the poor puppies.

cowardice

i'm afraid of letting people see the person i really am inside despite my being rather transparent nearly all the time.

i'm afraid of them knowing the emotions i hold despite me speaking my mind often

i'm afraid of penning the feelings down in black and white despite me doing it this very moment

i'm afraid of countless things despite being the daredevil i am

i'm afraid me being myself hurts other people despite waking up every morning acting as i am

i'm afraid of being abandoned despite the independent person i like to be

i'm afraid (,)

i'm a coward

this is nothing to savour or share but i'm definitely breathing it.

safe

just for my record,

i was involved in my first car accident after many years, today.

it was a chain accident which occured at the federal caused plainly by tailgating, speeding and not breaking on time.

3 cars were involved. we were the first (FC driving), followed by a car behind who swerved just in time to only cause multiple scratches at the left rear and finally another car (all were local cars) which had its bonnet severely contorted. liquid was leaking from the engine compartment onto the tar road.

i watched all this happen in full view through the left mirror. before i knew it happened, it ended. that was how fast it was.

then i realised how delicate our time on this earth is. one minute you could be up walking in full health and the next minute you could be without a pumping heart, frozen, dead.

you can never know when God's time for you is up.

at that moment, the milk would have gone sour.

then you/I wouldn't be able to wait for "Tomorrow" to make the decision which would change our lives or the people around us.

are you still waiting? are we? am I?

maybe this is blowing it up more than it really was, but i thank God that He granted me another day to live.

anything can happen. anything.